Dr. Wolfelt introduces the idea that there are tasks or things that we need to do to travel in a healthy way through grief. These needs help balance the loss in a way that we can look forward.
- Accepting the Reality of the loss: While this sounds easy, it may involve reliving the events leading up to the death daily, or even interrupting the course of your day. This is a time for patience. Know that the intensity of these reactions will decrease with time.
- Embrace the pain of the loss: This is not something you generally would want to do. By confronting your pain you learn to reconcile it, to heal the wound we call mourning.
- Remembering the person who died: Memories of your loved one are the most precious gift you can give yourself. For a time these may cause more pain. Remembering the past as it was can help in healing your future.
- Reinvesting in your life: What role did your loved one have in your life – wife, husband, mother, father? Learning how to continue living without them will take effort. You may need to find support from others to help.
- Searching for meaning: It is natural to question the meaning and purpose of life when a loved one dies. Many have shared how their faith and grief have come to a crossroads. This is a normal part of mourning.